Again, crowd response was better than it sounds in the video. There were something like fifteen people in the whole bar that night.
Showing posts with label capitalism. Show all posts
Showing posts with label capitalism. Show all posts
Saturday, August 11, 2012
Friday, October 7, 2011
Occupy Wall Street; Some Thoughts About
Here's some thoughts.
I watch the news. A lot. I've never been one of these "ignorance is bliss" types, although I've been jealous of those types for pretty much most of my life. I mine the news for information and ideas that I can use in my creative pursuits on a regular basis. This practice usually makes me depressed, cynical and pissy as a trailer park mom on child support payment day.
But I keep watching. The fucking news. Hoping and hoping that something will come along, that something will happen that is going to turn the country, if not the world, into the direction of progressive thought or at least something we can all agree on as common sense.
That day has come.
These Occupy Wall Street Protestors have earned my love in a way no blowjob ever could.
They may not have a leader. They may not have a centralized, cohesive, articulated or even well thought-out message, but, in the end, fuck you. They don't need one. This is not an organization we are dealing with. This is not a political party we are dealing with. This is not your fucking khakis!!!
This started just a couple weeks ago with twenty hippies in a park refusing to go home and now it's people screaming "FACSIST!" in cops faces.
I hear people on the news trying to compare them (or in some cases distance them) from the Tea Party movement.
The truth is this is the movement that ate the Tea Party. Or at least they ate the part of the Tea Party that mattered. The Tea Party got started by some right wing think tank with a good PR team that could mobilize people who were pissed off. At the end of the day those people were run, led and organized by Republicans.
the Occupation on the other hand is just chaos. It's everyone. It started with a few people with a broad, undefined message and now it's grown into God knows how many thousand or million people with a broad, undefined message.
And the part about their message being broad and undefined seems to be the cornerstone of the right wings criticism of them.
"Oh, typical liberal," they say. "You whine about a problem, but you don't propose any solution."
Which is obviously a bullshit counter argument. I mean, seriously, do you only complain about problems you have a solution to? Do you go see a doctor only when you know your diagnosis? Do you only take your car to the mechanic when you know what parts need to be replaced? No. Of course not. A person can be smart enough to notice a tumor without being dumb for not knowing how to deal with it.
And the tumor in this country right now comes down to a break down in equality.
Economic equality.
And when I use the words "economic equality" I don't mean what you probably think I mean.
Most people think that when I say "economic equality" I'm griping that some other guy has a lot of money and I don't. This is not the case.
Under the constitution of this great nation everyone is created equal. Remember that, because I'm going to get back to it in a second.
I make in the range of 25k per year. I'm comfortable with that being a single guy who doesn't own a car and lives in a shitty apartment. I'm also comfortable with the idea that other people make millions of dollars a year and live in massive fuck-off awesome mansions. Massive fuck-off awesome mansions sound nice, but I don't want to do what those people had to do to get to be millionares so I'm happy with my 30K a year job and modest apartment. Happiness is the key here. Me and the millionare are both free to persue that.
The problem originates at the point where the millionare gets to; lobby harder than I can, because he has more money; gets to advertise his political viewpoint further and wider because he has more money; gets to purchase campaigns (which is what the Citizens United ruling under the Supreme Court allowed them to do) simply becaucse he has more money; gets to say that the law does not appy to him because he has more money.
This is the state we live in. One voice no longer equals one vote. One voice equals a sound bite if that voice is lucky and in the right place and time when a camera is around and again only if that voice says what the network owners want to be heard.
A dollar, on the other hand, that equals a vote these days.
And that's a problem.
We don't hate the rich. Hugh Heffner is still cool. Let him keep his mansion. He earned it.
We hate the rich who exercise control. The ones whose desicions affect the rest of us, but avoid the consequences of those desicions. We hate those rich who tell us what we can and can't have regardless of the fact that we are equals to them under the constitution. We hate the rich assume a level of control that should be beyond the average citizen.
I've been telling my republican friends for years that capitalism should not be a game of survival of the fittest but instead a system where everyone thrives and only the most ambitious get to have the mega wealth. They all say, "Sorry, it's a game. There's winners and losers and the losers go hungry."
Ok, shithead. You wanted survival of the fittest. You got it. Welcome to the jungle. The rich are on the menu.
I watch the news. A lot. I've never been one of these "ignorance is bliss" types, although I've been jealous of those types for pretty much most of my life. I mine the news for information and ideas that I can use in my creative pursuits on a regular basis. This practice usually makes me depressed, cynical and pissy as a trailer park mom on child support payment day.
But I keep watching. The fucking news. Hoping and hoping that something will come along, that something will happen that is going to turn the country, if not the world, into the direction of progressive thought or at least something we can all agree on as common sense.
That day has come.
These Occupy Wall Street Protestors have earned my love in a way no blowjob ever could.
They may not have a leader. They may not have a centralized, cohesive, articulated or even well thought-out message, but, in the end, fuck you. They don't need one. This is not an organization we are dealing with. This is not a political party we are dealing with. This is not your fucking khakis!!!
This started just a couple weeks ago with twenty hippies in a park refusing to go home and now it's people screaming "FACSIST!" in cops faces.
I hear people on the news trying to compare them (or in some cases distance them) from the Tea Party movement.
The truth is this is the movement that ate the Tea Party. Or at least they ate the part of the Tea Party that mattered. The Tea Party got started by some right wing think tank with a good PR team that could mobilize people who were pissed off. At the end of the day those people were run, led and organized by Republicans.
the Occupation on the other hand is just chaos. It's everyone. It started with a few people with a broad, undefined message and now it's grown into God knows how many thousand or million people with a broad, undefined message.
And the part about their message being broad and undefined seems to be the cornerstone of the right wings criticism of them.
"Oh, typical liberal," they say. "You whine about a problem, but you don't propose any solution."
Which is obviously a bullshit counter argument. I mean, seriously, do you only complain about problems you have a solution to? Do you go see a doctor only when you know your diagnosis? Do you only take your car to the mechanic when you know what parts need to be replaced? No. Of course not. A person can be smart enough to notice a tumor without being dumb for not knowing how to deal with it.
And the tumor in this country right now comes down to a break down in equality.
Economic equality.
And when I use the words "economic equality" I don't mean what you probably think I mean.
Most people think that when I say "economic equality" I'm griping that some other guy has a lot of money and I don't. This is not the case.
Under the constitution of this great nation everyone is created equal. Remember that, because I'm going to get back to it in a second.
I make in the range of 25k per year. I'm comfortable with that being a single guy who doesn't own a car and lives in a shitty apartment. I'm also comfortable with the idea that other people make millions of dollars a year and live in massive fuck-off awesome mansions. Massive fuck-off awesome mansions sound nice, but I don't want to do what those people had to do to get to be millionares so I'm happy with my 30K a year job and modest apartment. Happiness is the key here. Me and the millionare are both free to persue that.
The problem originates at the point where the millionare gets to; lobby harder than I can, because he has more money; gets to advertise his political viewpoint further and wider because he has more money; gets to purchase campaigns (which is what the Citizens United ruling under the Supreme Court allowed them to do) simply becaucse he has more money; gets to say that the law does not appy to him because he has more money.
This is the state we live in. One voice no longer equals one vote. One voice equals a sound bite if that voice is lucky and in the right place and time when a camera is around and again only if that voice says what the network owners want to be heard.
A dollar, on the other hand, that equals a vote these days.
And that's a problem.
We don't hate the rich. Hugh Heffner is still cool. Let him keep his mansion. He earned it.
We hate the rich who exercise control. The ones whose desicions affect the rest of us, but avoid the consequences of those desicions. We hate those rich who tell us what we can and can't have regardless of the fact that we are equals to them under the constitution. We hate the rich assume a level of control that should be beyond the average citizen.
I've been telling my republican friends for years that capitalism should not be a game of survival of the fittest but instead a system where everyone thrives and only the most ambitious get to have the mega wealth. They all say, "Sorry, it's a game. There's winners and losers and the losers go hungry."
Ok, shithead. You wanted survival of the fittest. You got it. Welcome to the jungle. The rich are on the menu.
Thursday, June 23, 2011
I don't know if anyone has heard me openly scream my massive love for Jon Stewart and all the people who work at the Daily Show. But here is an example of Jon and staff burning a new asshole in the forehead of hypocrisy.
Laugh all you want. But be pissed. Jon makes his money from comedy. But comedy comes from truth. And the truth is we deserve better...from everything. Shit. It's a capitalist nation. that means we're paying for it. why can't we demand better?
Thursday, June 2, 2011
White Power Milk: How the Internet is Fucking With Me.
I watched a Louis C.K. bit one time (on "Hilarious," oddly enough.) where he defined the word "hilarious" as something that is so funny it breaks your mind. I don't know if the following is all that funny, but the cracks in my brain creak when I think about it. Naturally, my first inclination was to share it with you. You're welcome.
Here is the link to something called White Power Milk. Keep reading, I'm going full circle on this one.
I'm going to explain White Power Milk to you not just to explain it to you, but also to get it straight in my own head while I still remember that I am a living sentient organism on a very fucked up little rock hurtling around an indifferent sun and not a cartoon character in a disturbing 4chan video who only ever shows up in a leash and leather mask. Okay, here goes.
Basically, you give the nice people at White Power Milk a lot of money ($100 for an ounce and a half or $130 for two ounces). Then you choose from a line up of "milk purifiers." A milk purifier, before you ask, is, in this case, defined as a rich, pretty girl from an affluent family who are (and we want to emphasize this because the WPM website does) WHITE!!! The girl of your choice will then be led, or carried on a bed of rose pedals and newly minted hundred dollar bill by a parade of castrated attendants one imagines, into the spa area where she disrobes and is bathed and oiled by a fellow hot, young, rich, WHITE girl. During this phase of the operation your designated purifier will pay special attention to mouth rinsing for reasons which will soon become...
No, lets just stop and think about the process up until now. Two hot girls bathing each other. That's all we really need to think about. If you are a mentally well adjusted human being you can stop reading right there and go about your day, completely whole as a person right?
No? Need to hear more? Alright, fucko, you asked for it.
After the bathing and the nakedness, the girl you chose from line-up of pictures that look like they came from a book of "before" photos a heroin rehab clinic keeps around for advertising purposes will go into a small room, take a swig of organic milk, gargle for 10-15 seconds and then spit into a container about the size of a shot glass. With that done the owner of the website mails you the tiny bottle of organic milk purified by rich WHITE girl backwash.
All that costs a hundred bucks. Pleasure doing business, dipshit, who's next?
Yeah, I know what you're thinking because I was thinking it too. There's no way that's real. White Power Milk cannot be a real thing. Then a quick glance at the site's FAQ section assured me that "Fuck you, yes! It's a real thing."
Really? REALLY??? This? Is a thing?
This guy is selling organic milk (in very, very tiny amounts) to stupid rich fucks under the notion that the mouths of rich, pretty, WHITE girls has some magical cleansing effect on an already, pretty much benign substance. One assumes that because all the girls are rich, pretty, WHITE college students that normal vectors for orally transmitted diseases are immediately stunted by how rich, pretty and WHITE these girls are. Because, you know, pretty WHITE girls in their early twenties who go to really expensive universities never catch those nasty peasant diseases, right? Right?
The only thing more ridiculous that this is a thing is that it's totally not a thing. Except for the part where it's actually a thing. Stay with me.
A quick google search turns up this article by Alex Miller, a blogger who is, apparently, far less research lazy than I am. He points out that the website is run by a guy named Nate Hill a performance artist responsible for...some other stuff I probably don't care about. The girls in the photos are members of some hipster band that doesn't realize the rest of us are happy 1986 is over.
Then there is the Terms & Conditions page of whitepowermilk.com. There we find some giveaways that this isn't a thing.
Stuff like; "Buyer understands that if the specific woman selected to gargle milk is unavailable for any reason at the time of order, a replacement from this website will be selected on the buyer's behalf."
And, " Buyer understands that a portion of the information on this website has been fictionalized. Keep out of reach of children and pets. Exact ingredients’ lists of products are known only to the product manufacturer. All sales are final."
My favorite line after the bit about certain information being fictionalized is this one; "White Power Milk is not sold or intended for human consumption."
To paraphrase the Terms & Conditions page in my own words, "Hi, I'm about to rip you off. But you're not going to sue me for ripping you off because I'm telling you that I'm ripping you off up front. But you're still going to give me money because I'm doing it in an artful, clever way. You're basically paying me for being really, really clever. Being clever is worth something, right? Especially since you are so very, very not clever."
Alright, so the whole thing is an art project. Nate Hill is doing what satirists have always done. Putting something stupid into the world to show the world how stupid it really is. I suppose, the point of this is something about capitalism and the objectification of women and racism is obviously going to be in the mixed bag of subtext somewhere.
IRRELEVANT TANGENT GO!
There's probably also a lesson about how my penis makes me a bad boy for finding all those girls and their mouths attractive. Because whether it's a conservative christian dipshit with a "God Hates Fags" sign on the side of the road or a liberal performance art dipshit with a clever website, domination always begins at the genital level. Anyone who says you're wrong for liking what you like is an obvious sociopath hellbent on ruling the world. As long as you aren't raping or harassing or hurting anyone (without their permission, of course. Some of you are kinkier than others) and as long as you aren't having sex with any kids, feel free to ignore any asshole who wants you on his particular anti-sex guilt trip. You're welcome.
IRRELEVANT TANGENT STOP!
So, what's the problem here? I mean, we've established that this White Power Milk thing isn't a thing. It's just one of those easily dismissible arty things that only pretentious douche bags would even pay attention to in the first place as a sad attempt to appear smart, right? Sanity is restored. Situation normal, all fucked up, right?
Wrong! You see, we haven't gotten to the really fucked up part. We haven't gotten to the part that widened the ever deepening fissures in my already crumbling psyche.
You see, even though White Power Milk is a translucent hoax\artfully constructed middle finger to society, they are still selling the milk.
I repeat. The milk, that's probably not milk, that was gargled by girls, who most likely never gargled it or did anything other than show up for the photo shoot that one time, is still on sale and two ounces of it will cost you more than I made waiting tables at the restaurant for eight hours on Friday night. And this art project designed to show how capitalism objectifies women by creating a fake service that provides a fraudulent product is actually collecting a very real paycheck for having objectified those women who didn't gargle the milk.
You see how I'm dizzy right now.
If you're a satirist and you create a bit of irony that eats itself; job well done. If you're going to sit there and eat your own irony as would a mental patient gleefully licking the feces off his own fingers like ice cream...well, I guess, job well done, asshole.
Here is the link to something called White Power Milk. Keep reading, I'm going full circle on this one.
I'm going to explain White Power Milk to you not just to explain it to you, but also to get it straight in my own head while I still remember that I am a living sentient organism on a very fucked up little rock hurtling around an indifferent sun and not a cartoon character in a disturbing 4chan video who only ever shows up in a leash and leather mask. Okay, here goes.
Basically, you give the nice people at White Power Milk a lot of money ($100 for an ounce and a half or $130 for two ounces). Then you choose from a line up of "milk purifiers." A milk purifier, before you ask, is, in this case, defined as a rich, pretty girl from an affluent family who are (and we want to emphasize this because the WPM website does) WHITE!!! The girl of your choice will then be led, or carried on a bed of rose pedals and newly minted hundred dollar bill by a parade of castrated attendants one imagines, into the spa area where she disrobes and is bathed and oiled by a fellow hot, young, rich, WHITE girl. During this phase of the operation your designated purifier will pay special attention to mouth rinsing for reasons which will soon become...
No, lets just stop and think about the process up until now. Two hot girls bathing each other. That's all we really need to think about. If you are a mentally well adjusted human being you can stop reading right there and go about your day, completely whole as a person right?
No? Need to hear more? Alright, fucko, you asked for it.
After the bathing and the nakedness, the girl you chose from line-up of pictures that look like they came from a book of "before" photos a heroin rehab clinic keeps around for advertising purposes will go into a small room, take a swig of organic milk, gargle for 10-15 seconds and then spit into a container about the size of a shot glass. With that done the owner of the website mails you the tiny bottle of organic milk purified by rich WHITE girl backwash.
All that costs a hundred bucks. Pleasure doing business, dipshit, who's next?
Yeah, I know what you're thinking because I was thinking it too. There's no way that's real. White Power Milk cannot be a real thing. Then a quick glance at the site's FAQ section assured me that "Fuck you, yes! It's a real thing."
Really? REALLY??? This? Is a thing?
This guy is selling organic milk (in very, very tiny amounts) to stupid rich fucks under the notion that the mouths of rich, pretty, WHITE girls has some magical cleansing effect on an already, pretty much benign substance. One assumes that because all the girls are rich, pretty, WHITE college students that normal vectors for orally transmitted diseases are immediately stunted by how rich, pretty and WHITE these girls are. Because, you know, pretty WHITE girls in their early twenties who go to really expensive universities never catch those nasty peasant diseases, right? Right?
The only thing more ridiculous that this is a thing is that it's totally not a thing. Except for the part where it's actually a thing. Stay with me.
A quick google search turns up this article by Alex Miller, a blogger who is, apparently, far less research lazy than I am. He points out that the website is run by a guy named Nate Hill a performance artist responsible for...some other stuff I probably don't care about. The girls in the photos are members of some hipster band that doesn't realize the rest of us are happy 1986 is over.
Then there is the Terms & Conditions page of whitepowermilk.com. There we find some giveaways that this isn't a thing.
Stuff like; "Buyer understands that if the specific woman selected to gargle milk is unavailable for any reason at the time of order, a replacement from this website will be selected on the buyer's behalf."
And, " Buyer understands that a portion of the information on this website has been fictionalized. Keep out of reach of children and pets. Exact ingredients’ lists of products are known only to the product manufacturer. All sales are final."
My favorite line after the bit about certain information being fictionalized is this one; "White Power Milk is not sold or intended for human consumption."
To paraphrase the Terms & Conditions page in my own words, "Hi, I'm about to rip you off. But you're not going to sue me for ripping you off because I'm telling you that I'm ripping you off up front. But you're still going to give me money because I'm doing it in an artful, clever way. You're basically paying me for being really, really clever. Being clever is worth something, right? Especially since you are so very, very not clever."
Alright, so the whole thing is an art project. Nate Hill is doing what satirists have always done. Putting something stupid into the world to show the world how stupid it really is. I suppose, the point of this is something about capitalism and the objectification of women and racism is obviously going to be in the mixed bag of subtext somewhere.
IRRELEVANT TANGENT GO!
There's probably also a lesson about how my penis makes me a bad boy for finding all those girls and their mouths attractive. Because whether it's a conservative christian dipshit with a "God Hates Fags" sign on the side of the road or a liberal performance art dipshit with a clever website, domination always begins at the genital level. Anyone who says you're wrong for liking what you like is an obvious sociopath hellbent on ruling the world. As long as you aren't raping or harassing or hurting anyone (without their permission, of course. Some of you are kinkier than others) and as long as you aren't having sex with any kids, feel free to ignore any asshole who wants you on his particular anti-sex guilt trip. You're welcome.
IRRELEVANT TANGENT STOP!
So, what's the problem here? I mean, we've established that this White Power Milk thing isn't a thing. It's just one of those easily dismissible arty things that only pretentious douche bags would even pay attention to in the first place as a sad attempt to appear smart, right? Sanity is restored. Situation normal, all fucked up, right?
Wrong! You see, we haven't gotten to the really fucked up part. We haven't gotten to the part that widened the ever deepening fissures in my already crumbling psyche.
You see, even though White Power Milk is a translucent hoax\artfully constructed middle finger to society, they are still selling the milk.
I repeat. The milk, that's probably not milk, that was gargled by girls, who most likely never gargled it or did anything other than show up for the photo shoot that one time, is still on sale and two ounces of it will cost you more than I made waiting tables at the restaurant for eight hours on Friday night. And this art project designed to show how capitalism objectifies women by creating a fake service that provides a fraudulent product is actually collecting a very real paycheck for having objectified those women who didn't gargle the milk.
You see how I'm dizzy right now.
If you're a satirist and you create a bit of irony that eats itself; job well done. If you're going to sit there and eat your own irony as would a mental patient gleefully licking the feces off his own fingers like ice cream...well, I guess, job well done, asshole.
Monday, November 1, 2010
FARTS
I think I frightened some people by laughing at this video in public. It's from an article by David Wong about how the world is so supremely fucked by stupid people that all you can really do is try and squeeze a laugh out of watching it burn. The only sad part of the article is the subtle realization that those stupid people we're talking about, yeah, they're us.
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